Welcome back Cinemaster Fans! After an extended hiatus of 8 seasons in the Octagon, we have returned and are coming out of the gate hot with tot action! We’ve got all the chapstick your lips can take no matter how bad they hurt and these AREN’T from the school nurse’s desk. We’re taking you all the way back to 2004 to Preston, Idaho for the indie classic Napoleon Dynamite, but don’t worry we didn’t forget to put the crystals in the time machine. Whether you’ve been home chatting with babes online all day, making a video about throwing a pigskin a quartermile, or hunting wolverines with a friggin 12 gauge, this movie has just what you need. So grab your boondoggle keychain (a MUST have for this season’s fashion), hop on your Huffy Sledgehammer and fix yourself a dang quesadilla as our Cinemasters run through their favorite moments in this oh so quotable gem. The only question left to ask is how are you feelin’ about this 32 piece set as we kick off 2022’s first episode of CINEMASTERS OF THE UNIVERSE!!!
Ron "The Rental King" Avis
I am your host to the left. In the ancient days when the stirring of the great volcano foretold the coming of the Cinemasters, I prepared the way by imbibing the forgotten lore of all things Cine-magical, hence I am the one who drinks. It is through my liquid merriment that I bind my talents to the other half of our intrepid duo to expertly craft the audio and visual wonderment beholden to the masses via the internets of old. By the secret wisdom handed to me through fluid consumption, our awesomeness is perfected like an electrical shock wave out of the tip of a unicorn horn directly into the aortic valve of your heart where the secrets of the universe are hidden. I am romantically entangled with a wondrous lady whom I call my wife. She has bore me the progeny of a son and a daughter and it is by this offspring that it is possible for me to be a Rad Dad. Everything seen and heard from the Cinemasters is by my hand.